Q – Qualities I Adore 

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There are many but just sharing a few here. There is so much to learn from him and I wish I learn them soon.

Planning

He planned ahead and didn’t wait for the last-minute hustle. Every year in November my parents had to provide a form to the bank to continue their pension. That year, after we lost him in October, maa had to fill that form just for herself. When she checked the folder to get the documents, she found two forms that baba had already filled in advance and kept to be used in November. Maa was in tears, so were we, how much he wanted to live more, how much he was in love with life, he was particular about everything and maa thanked him for filling her form too. 

Neat and tidy 

All his things were always kept in the place they belonged to. Not an inch here and there. His clothes, neatly folded and stacked, his documents inside separate folders, beautiful pens in the pen-stand, music cassettes stacked according to the genres. His clothes looked new for years, he washed them on his own, ironed them and was always the best-dressed man. I remember I would sit beside him and watch him iron my school uniform, he would sprinkle a little water on the clothes, fold each pleat of the skirt and sit for hours doing it patiently. That was his Sunday routine and today when I do it my kids sit beside me and curiously watch everything I do. I look at them and smile. 

Handwriting 

I wish I had a photo of his handwriting with me right now so I could share the beauty with the world. A page written by him, whether in English or Bengali was a piece of decoration in itself. Maa would make us sit and copy his handwriting. Every day one page of writing, trying to write like baba but none of us got that beauty. The neatness and patience with which he used to write the words made it appear like a print copy. Maa hated her handwriting and was a big fan of baba’s handwriting so whenever she had to write something she would turn to baba. All the applications, letters and forms were filled by him and he would happily do it. 

Progressive

He always looked ahead, was broad-minded and was not affected by his past or failures. He taught us too, not to give much importance to what people say, that should never affect us and our decisions. He believed in gaining knowledge and learning new things and didn’t pay much attention to what the future holds for us, never really believed in horoscopes and predictions. He taught us to be good, do good and not worry about the results. 

Equality

We grew up watching our parents do everything together, never divided a job based on gender. We have seen maa go to the bank to deposit money and we have also seen baba cook a delicious meal for us. He taught me how to fix electric things at home, how to repair my cycle, how to travel alone, book tickets, how to take care of my safety, how to manage finance and be independent. Things that we don’t often teach girls but he also made sure I learn music, cooking, sewing, washing my clothes and utensils, cleaning the home and garden and taking care of pets. He made us believe that there is nothing in this world that we can’t do. 

He was the reason behind a lot of things I did. I had to travel alone, take a flight for the first time in my life and I was a bit scared but there he was giving me all the confidence I needed. When I had to change my job, he was there to help me decide. When I decided whom to marry, he was there to support me. When I first invited guests for dinner, he gave suggestions on what can we prepare for dinner. He was always there, helping, supporting and bringing out the best in me. Today, when I miss talking to him, I sit quietly and think about all that he said before and I still get my answers. 

Coming up next-

R- Railway and the Memories

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